This trip was so good for me. It was nice to dress up everyday and not cringe every time I passed a mirror. It was dreamy to see so many friends and family. To have grown-up conversations and make connections. It was lovely to be in a place where I grew by leaps and bounds as a college student. Conference was fantastic and my spiritual cup was full. It was so nice to eat meals I didn't have to prepare or clean up after and to always come home to a clean room and made beds.
This trip was so good for Ireland. It was so nice to have the sibling rivalry put on hold for a significant amount of time. She loved having me all to herself and we held hands and snuggled pretty much the entire time. It was good for her to experience a different part of the country and to marvel at mountains and rainbows and realize what an arid climate feels like. It was good for her to swim and run and zipline and skip about to her heart's content. It was good for her to be seen and heard and not just lost in the shuffle of what needs to get done right now and who needs attention the most. It was good for her to have time to just quietly think.
This trip was so good for us. Going into it, I thought I knew Ireland a solid 85% and there was just a bit that was still a mystery to me. In the end, I felt like I know her more like 40% and I have a lot of work to do as her mother. I need to teach her to laugh more. I need to find time to snuggle with her. I need to help her with patience. I need to let her know how loved and valued she is in our family. I need to demonstrate more kindness. So many of our conversations made my jaw drop. Ireland told me she hates all the fighting between the sisters- even though she seems to be at the center of most of them. She said Brigitta tells really funny stories at night- and we've spent the last several weeks trying to figure out if we should put Ireland in her own room to give the two of them space.
I'm a big believer in these 8-year-old trips with Mom. When all the distractions are stripped away and I get this chance to really, truly get to know my girls, our bond grows so strong. I'm so grateful to Brent for supporting these trips and arranging his schedule so he can take care of things at home. On the surface, it seems like he does all the hard work while I take off on vacation. But these trips are so much more than just a vacation.
A curious thing happened while we were in Utah. I only noticed because it happened half a dozen times, at least. Someone I was talking to or being introduced to found out I was from out-of-town. They would excitedly ask me where I was from and when I said, "Chicago" they were clearly taken aback and responded, "Oh, I haven't been there yet" as if they felt bad. I thought it was odd, and a little entertaining, because of course I had no expectations that everyone in Utah should visit my little corner of the world. But a few of those people added, "But I want to visit." I felt compelled to tell them about the great city of Chicago and over time I became more and more homesick. Ireland and I had gotten all we could out of our trip and then some.
It was time to go home.
No comments:
Post a Comment